Review: Nixfrixshun Ultimate Chain Lube
(2018) Given the creakybottombracket.com’s proximity to Pennsylvania Dutch country, it is no surprise one of the favorite treats in the freezer dons the dialectic phrase ‘Nix Besser.’ From the not too distant part of the commonwealth Nelson’s ice cream can be found in the most unexpected places. When our eyes are laid on the quintessential packaging of a white ice cream tub with a gold cardboard lid, it gets snatched up. Only after checking out is the flavor regarded. The phrase ‘Nix Besser’ as old as the commonwealth, means ‘None Better.’
It was by no surprise when a bottle of Nix Frix Shun ultimate chain lube rolled onto our desk that we could translate the label. Along the same lines of tradition, the company features a catchy little slogan, ‘The Last Chain Lube You Will Ever Need.’ Based in Rockville, MD, the company is not too far from the land of the Pennsylvania Dutch. Would the ‘No Friction’ status live up to its label? We had the perfect conditions to find out.
Before we get too far into the experiment, it must be pointed out your muse has come quite the distance from the childhood days of using Husqvarna chainsaw grease for chain lube. My dad had a jug of it in our ‘smokehouse’ (we had an old farmhouse), and I crammed a stick into the jug. I would remove the stick every once in a while and lather up the pivots to keep my bike rolling. As I moved onto road I chased the eternal favored lube. Some stuff seemed to evaporate moments after I application. Other brands require warming up prior to usage. One brand bragged to last 1,000 miles or more. But that means 1,000 miles of grit and gunk build up, even when wiped down.
Immediately after a wet Kermesse Sport Sourland Semi-Classic at the end of last month I found myself needing to hose of the bike in cyclocross pit fashion with a bike stand, a bucket of suds, an oversized sponge, and a power washer. New Jersey gravel roads carry an extra ingredient. Sand never makes a drivetrain sound healthy. The chain sucked up its fair share of road grit and sand on the metric century opening spring classic. I gave special attention to the chain to relieve it of its abrasive content. After a once-over with a rag to absorb residual moisture, I pulled out the Nixfrixshun Ultimate Chain Lube and applied it as directed, nearly every other pivot. In some places it was begging for more, but for the most part I followed the direction on the label stating ‘A little goes a long way.’
The next day was an unscheduled recovery ride; no doubt I would listen for any difficulty with the chain. All I heard was the wind as I covered the first few miles in happiness. Moving further the bike stayed quiet past the moments when other chain lubes would have burned off. I thought perhaps it was beginners luck and after returning I again followed the directions of wiping the outsides of the chain of any buildup.
Throughout the week I found myself on the trainer and heard everything except a noisy chain. The chorus of gunk and grit I expected to hear long after the ride never did. Perhaps it would struggle to stand up to the melting snow puddles on further outdoor rides. Weeks later and the drivetrain is still peaceful and grit-free. Furthermore, the chain stays were clear of excessive lube, a personal pet peeve.
With this weekend’s Hell of Hunterdon forecasted to be a bit wet from the residual three nor’easters that have hit the area in recent weeks, I have full confidence in the Nixfrixshun chain lube to absorb the grit of New Jersey pave sectors and wick it to the outside for an easy wipe-down. With the quick wipe down the chain shines once again and is a sight worth looking at while digging deep to close the gap. For those who maintain their own rigs, this is two ounces of wholesomeness. Once you’re finished using the two ounces, you are free to turn to the ‘true’ one-gallon tub of Nelson’s ice cream because of the time saved not worrying about the chain. There’s nothing better than that.